Pete Zarhutt

A nightmare consortium of DC, the cast of Rainbow, Liz Truss, Orange Donald & Jack Nicholson from the The Shining. Our Leighton can only look on in stunned disbelief.

We've no-one else available thanks to Elephant Man so he either starts or comes on as a sub. Anywhere else or under normal circumstances here, he would have been bombed out completely or sent on loan to somewhere like Newport. He needs one to go in off his nose, backside or anything just to give him some confidence back, but it may be beyond that now. When you're a striker in that sort of run, you go back to basically goal-hanging to play your way back into some sort of form & confidence. That would be in a normal team/squad though. Not the patched up, threadbare team that we have at the moment.

Lowest point was the Middlesbrough game & the days leading up to it. We were in a dark tunnel then & couldn't see any light. Now we are still in that tunnel, but can see some light & it will get steadily brighter. Can you imagine what today would have been like if Elephant Man was still clinging on here? It doesn't bear thinking about.

I was surprised he said it, but doubt he would if we'd have got a point or more from that game.

He has been dealt the crappest hand in our history thanks to Elephant Man.

The result & the score were not a shock, but the lack of fight was. Blades would never have had a better chance to run up a cricket score against us & for whatever reason they didn't go for it. What surprised me most was Wilders comments after the game - he acknowledged that we are a sh*tshow thanks to DC and spoke very highly of Baz & Liam Palmer - whether he would have done that if the outcome was different is another matter. Not a game to look back with any fondness. Harry A was ok, the keeper bailed us out a couple of times & Cooper looked decent if rusty when he came on. But otherwise, - meh

Jewell was basically lied to about how bad things actually were, just to get a manager in the door.

Yes. The kids in the lower Lepp used go mental when it came on.

Nolan Sisters? Beethoven? Demis Roussos? The Jam? Wham? Sabrina Carpenter? Manual & His Music Of The Mountains? What? Who? What?

I can't decide whether Brighton 83 or Everton 86 upsets me more. Brighton were on the way down & were there for the taking. Everton had beat us twice in the league but had Lineker out injured - surely 3rd time lucky? Erm...no On balance 86. But there was the compensation of being 17 & at college and having found a nice girlfriend who helped me take my mind off the defeat that weekend.

Post Chansiri? Great idea. Pizza oven or wood chipper?

He would squirrel it away in an old tree. Where it would be shredded and turned into a nest by a family of squirrels. Succesful Businessman strikes again.

Just watch him start scoring now. Nurse? What have you done with my tablets?

Forget Xmas. We still need a party just to celebrate Elephant Man being stuffed into a cannon and fired in general direction of Bangkok.

Remember Billy The Fish in Viz? The Fulchester Utd team manager either resigned or was sacked every other week. Only to be reappointed for the next game. Wilder is like that manager. He has turned them into a comic strip, only they don't have Billy The Fish in goal - but they do have Syddie The Sloth in midfield.